Note to SELF: You’re Awake!

It is 3:00 a.m.

You are suddenly awake and looking at the clock, again.

You have been here before and you have felt the tug at your heart and the questions flood your mind.

Why am I awake again? Why does this keep happening? Has reality become this skewed and why do I feel all of these emotions and energies flying at me? What does this all mean? Am I losing my mind? What are these conversations in my heart? Why the migraines? Is reality really this way?

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There’s something wrong with me, right? Everyone else thinks so, maybe it’s true? Have I truly gone off the deep end by seeing things others don’t see? The doctor says I’m fine, but I don’t feel fine. Am I the only one going through these feelings and pain?

We find ourselves stuck in the middle of a life that feels false, our hands reaching for connections that are deeper than anything we’ve ever known. Our spirit cries out for understanding and release from pain. Everything feels alive and vibrations are appearing in music, the wind, the waves, heartbeats, and people around you.

You try to hide away thinking that the solitude will cure the questions and strangeness of reality unfolding quickly. Only peace and quiet can help develop the patience of your changes, and boy, you really are changing.

Home no longer feels right and your true home is somewhere we’ve forgotten since we were children- no, since before we were born. Your life finally makes sense and each piece, each experience, is another page to your story and the connection to the present. All of the small things you ignored or counted off as coincidence suddenly become large signs. You wonder if it’s paranoia or something being whispered to you that others don’t hear.

The stars, sun, and clouds speak to us and our travels suddenly make sense. Every experience begins to make sense and the longing of our hearts will only be satisfied through a path less traveled. Time no longer has the same effect and old habits begin to fade away as they make us feel sick. The searching begins as small messages from the universe appear day-in and day-out, each message getting bigger until we see them everywhere. You feel alone but at the same time you know there has to be others out there like you. You feel the earth beneath your toes and the sky is a new shade of blue as you cross through the shadows of your mind. Emotions are felt on all levels and you can’t describe the love filling you.

The thoughts that take over for a person in conversations with the universe around them are many. Questions come and go and patterns play themselves out until we finally recognize what’s going on and how we might be repeating cycles that keep us clouded from the messages.

You’re seeking the signs of enlightenment and true authentic growth. The fusion of energy and connection to everything around you becomes overwhelming.

A heart awakening.

A gift.

11:11.

Anything mired in the realm of fake no longer satisfies you with your new eyes and heart. You’ve seen things that you’ll never be able to explain to others and you kind of don’t want to. Being awake and seeing the signs and synchronicities daily as they become a guide for your intuition as you grow.

Keep on fighting and growing. You are now in flow. The battle makes sense. Your life makes more sense than it ever did. You’ve found source.

For once you are truly connected. Let the universe speak, it has a lot to say once you wake up. Consciousness, balance, love, and energy.

Your soul-renity is here, in the truth that separation is but an illusion.